8 years to 30...yikes!

2006-07-12T02:44:00.000-07:00

hmm...another new year...yes, year after year the figure doesn't get any smaller. What does anyway? Even the price of petrol doesn't get any smaller either...right? well, being 22 sure doesn't change anything. I still wake up in the morning to rush to work.Only to joy for was the unlimited smses received since last midnight. To my surprise, most of my long lost uncontacted friends, pet sis, pet bro and ex boyfriends start calling and wishing my birthday...isn't it amazing how people remember your birthday. The best part was when I was on the way home from subang...my best friend buat 'makan-makan' thought was for my b'day...tapi dia pun terlupa...hahaha...neway, back to the story...so it was 11.45pm and a 'private number' appeared. Guess who? It was my little ex bf who excitedly called and straight away sung a b'day song for me. After he finished i was shocked and was silent at the spur moment. He asked" why are you quiet?" I replied..."you're 15 minutes early" He said"Oh...really? I was so excited since this morning and i thought it was 12am on the dot! But...i forgot that my watch was 15 minutes early". I thought that was it. Then he continued anxiously..."never mind...u hold on n i'll call u back at 12 n sing u again...so he did...cute huh? Then, as ususal...sms after sms with bday wishes n complaints that they couldn't get through my phone...but 1 phone call that i waited for was from my mum. She didn't call at 12 midnight but she called me this morning in the office. I was touched...and i do really miss her. Unfortunately today, I can't celebrate. I've got fever and flue...must be from the disturbed sleep i got from the last 2 nights coz of Suemo...She kept waking me up with her cry for food and water and pee. I also had to attend to her at 4am last night when she vormitted. Cats...just like having a dughter. She came to me n licked me on the cheek this morning...like she knows it's my birthday.sweet huh? Anyway...i do hope life's better for me.

P/S: I wanted to write in about my street interview yesterday but I'm a lil bit drowsy today.Will try to put an antry tommorrow...and see what you think of Malaysians from now on. Tungggguuuuuu........

we pLan.GoD dEcideS.

2006-07-01T02:59:00.000-07:00

How often do we say the words that we don't really understand? And how often do we advice people by saying words of wisdom that we ourselves have no experience of? Funny huh? To some, maybe.To me, it wasn't so. Where do i start to tell the story of a broken heart? It was end of April when i met this new guy at a dinner function in conjuction of secretaries week. No, I'm not a secretary.I covered the TV program for a local TV station. So there he was starring at me while the PR exec asked me his question: are u single? I answered: It depends on who's asking. So she pointed towards him. Ireplied:maybe.Then, before the dinner had ended, I excused myself upon my band rehearsal for the MCOBA OBW(Old Boys Weekend)- no, I'm not from MCKK, I'm just their vocalist. Back to the story, we said goodbye and i parted off. Two days later, upon my approval for him to have my number via my PR friend, he called and we started talking.

First date was at a mamak stall and we sat there for hours.The dates were contagious as we were practically dating every night,countless hours, countless phone calls, u just name the time n place and he'll be there.There was once where he picked me up at 11pm and we 'lepak' til 5am. He sent me back and headed home. As he reached home, he called and talked to me til 7am and went to work at 8.30am. Isn't that mad? Hmm...that was love. So there was this one weekend that we went for a day trip to Penang. Yupp, he 'proposed'-not to be his wife. Just his girlfriend. OK, so i said yes. We reached KL in the evening and he suddenly had this 'bright' plan of his to bring me to visit his parents and teh sister.(geez...isn't it too fast?) I was reluctant but he persuaded and I agreed.

So we went and being the 'ringan mulut' type that I am, they liked me. Sweet huh? Not so...The next day, after work, we went for dinner and when he sent me back, I heard something folowing me up the stairs. But i was in the lift. I was about to open my grill when i heard someone panting and trying to acknowledge me. It was a woman. Quite Fair, out-of-shape body. Those kampung type but changed to be KL people sort la (u'll know why i say this later on). Anyway...she came up n asked if I was going out with the guy named R. I said yes. She asked if I've slept with him. I said no. Then i asked who are you? she showed her gold bracelett spelt "MONA". (wow, it's just 18k gold,not a 24!) Then she claims that she's married to him and showed photographs of both of them. But, one thing for sure, i didn't see any wedding ring.

To save the matter, I said, look, if it's true why don't we go downstairs and settle this. So we ddid n i called R and he came. Guess what time it was? 3am.crazy right? So there i was in teh middle of these two. I listened to what both of them had to say and found out that he had broken off with the girl (x-gf) yet still living under one roof.So they argued and argued. Me? i went off to one side and R came running to me n after a while the crazy woman dissapeared. To further convince me that morning, his eldest sister came to the rescue la konon. Telling me not to 'layan' the psychopath and what not. He even showed me the letter that she wrote asking for the break up n want nothing to do with him anymore. BLA BLA BLA.

At that time, i was tired and i said i want to go home n we'll talk about this tommorrow. Came tommorrow and I said to resolve this as soon as possible. To start with, i suggested to move his stuff to my place.So he did. We were happy after that. Then one morining, two weeks later, I woke up to realize that there was some form of gel-liked ointment at my handphone with the scent of jasmine. Some sort like the hindus burn for praying. I was suspicious and told R but it didnt worry me too much as i wasn't a supersticious believer.But being the kid from a family with 'saka' that he is, he sensed that something was gonna happen.Two days, the scent surrounded me whenever i came home.

To test, I asked my friend to follow me home but she said she smelt nothing. The third and the fourth day, somthing slept on me. I couldnt wake up and it was hard to breath. Malay says 'kena hempap'. During the third and the fouth day, I came home one night to find my my 4.5 feet floor lamp was still standing despite being badly scratched at the top part. To think that my cat Suemo did it, it surely would have fallen down because the weight wasn't that heavy either to bare suemo's weight.Anyway, the 5th night came and after R went to collect money from the psycho, he picked me up to go to my uncle Z's house. During the journey, i said to R that i suddenly felt like i hated him and wanted to throw him out of the car. I quickly asked him to hug me but then i started crying cause something wasn't feeling too good.

After the visist, he suggested to go back to his parents house just incase something happens to me, As soon as we reached teh house, we went histerical. I could feel the rush when the 'presence' crossed my aura line. We were practically groaning like suemo wrestlers at each other. Iwas crying because i could feel theat hius presence was against my presence. The force was so strong. So teh family did some 'baca-baca of ayat AL-QURAN' and the thing couldn't pass through the front door. Still trying, the poresence played outside teh sliding door trying so hard to come in the house. Since that night, I was asked to sleep over his parents. With this, we went for 'berubat'. I had to mandi bunga for three consecutive nights and R only needed to do it the last night.

It was said that a woman sent this for both of us to seperate us and a man sent it to me cause he liked me so much. I don't know about the man but one thing we knew was the woman must be the psycho. I don't wanna point fingers but chances are... We were better after going through the mandi bunag rituals. Three days later the psycho went into ICU. We were in the middle of watching X-Men and his phone rang. I went out to check on him and also since it was freezing to find out that he was contemplating to go n visit her. I said no as iI told him that I'm very aware of this type of women. These are the type who would go to the extrteme to get what they want.They're very capable.Kampung!

After fighting, calming down, went for a drink and letting him go without my willingness,he went. I was upset to see that he actually went. His excuse was none of her family knew and he was just helping as a human to human. I said bad remarks and he said i was inhumane.Call me whatever you wish but I know she's got issues and agenda. Two days later he went back to his parents after we were just about to have dinner but didnt because he had an emergency call from the family to go home. So he dropped me. I was about to open the door when i remebered taht i had left my house key. Luckilly, i brought my handbags which had my carkeys (banyak sangat bag).

I drove to pick up my friend to accompany me to his parents house at somewhere people don't wanna live anymore. I had this feeling that ALLAH was trying to make me see for the second time, as I arrived, truth be told, the younger brother told me that psycho was there. She had slept there 2 nights and now she's going for 'berubat' with the family. I stepped out of his car that the younger brother was gonna drive to follow to find his mother came up to me and asked "ha, kamu nak apa lagi"? (what do u want) - Geez, she said that afetr being nice to me for the whole week? Something's wrong. They went off and left me clouded. I walked up to his other three sisters and they seemed ok when i asked about the psycho. Like as though it's me who's the friend and psycho now is the gf. D'oh. I was pissed and went home anyway.

After this incident, life went on but it wasn't good as before. Things happened so fast and I deciuded to move. As i finished my freelance job teh end of May, I got a new job offer starting 1st June. So i thought, rezeki I dapat kerja terus event hough in this kind of situation. Three days later, as i was packing my kitchen utensils at 3am with R, (he helped me pack that nite), someone knocked my door.Wll, more of like stomping really. R took the housekeys and opened. He opened and there was the mother, eldest sister (that asked me not to layan the psycho), teh psycho and his younger brither. That morning, I was assaulted. They came in and punched me, kicked me, screamed, yelled, pulled my hair and everything that that the whole block could hear. I was hurt real bad. my left eye was bruised, legs, scrateces at my arms and legs. But most of all, I was hurt inside.

I was traumatised. I was struggling alone while R tried to save but his mother (yang dah nak separuh mati) stopped him from doing do. I was alone in that battle. I gave a hard kick at psycho's stomach after she attacked me in my room together with the eldest sister.Then she dragged me to my living room by pulling my hair. Later, she went histerical (masuk hantu-kan family dia ada saka). She was spitting in my house and at me. I avoided. She also said bad words and all tha s**t.

She said that I was the one who was crazy about R cause he has a good job and a nice car. I kept silent and said in my heart: Setakat adik kau tu, yang berkelulusan SPM n blajar buat grafik sendiri, tak payah lah. Setakat bawak swift,so what? My exes are beamer owners. No big deal n to the state where I could even think that darjat keluarga I lagi mulia dari keluarga kau yang mak bapak dulu jual sayur n sekarang mak bapak bawak Jazz cause anak kasi. I f i wanna compare and say my status and all the education we have, I would just be at the same level as she is. So be it. I kept quiet to save my rights in court.I think ahead. Justice will prevail.Anyway, it was painful and I was tired.

Then the psycho steped up and said "kau tendang perut ni yang mengandungkan anak R dulu. Sorry ye ma cakap macam ni" (you kicked this tummy who carried R's child before, sorry mum). Then the mother nodded to akcnowledge a yes, I'm okay with the abbortion. You can still be my future daughter in-law. Yikes! Then the three psycho women came towards me and wanted to hit me again but i took my padlock and held it high as if i was gonna throw at them and shooed them out.

My house was a mess and I called papa and my bestfriend right after the incident. Papa arrived at 5am and my best friend slightly before. Just in time to comfort me. That morning i was suppose to move at 11am but had to call the lorry company to postpone til 3pm. So we went to the police station, Sungai Buloh Hospital to do my medical report which I went nuts cause I had to wait for 45 minutes at the ER. I yelled at them saying that if someone were to die they'd already be dead. Only after i did that, they entertained me.It was hard while inspecting on me, the doctor asked what happened, I couldn't hold my tears and drained it all out when trying to recall what happened.

Then we hit back to the police station and they issued the report and asked me to go to another station to meet the inspector who will be handling my case. So by the time we reached the inspector's office, it was 9.30am and he came to see us only at 10.30am. Imagine the waiting at that time, It felt rorever. Plus i didnt have enough sleep. At that time, R was over at his other sister's house. He later came to be the witness for the case. To spice it up, he told me that they (the psyscho mum,sister, psycho) had also filed a report. This is what u call a 'cover' report-that's what the inspector said. Wow...some people huh?

Anyway, all was settled by lunch time but as we headed home, i needed to get back to packing cause lorry arrives at 3. Damn i was tired but had no choice. So then everything was stuffed in the lorry and it was time to go to my cousin's place. I walked towards my car n found that my front screen was smashed. Who else? To solve the puzzle, only a week later R had told me that the security outside my apartment might have seen it coz my parking lot was near to their booth. So I went and it aws true enough that he had seen it all. Then, i took his number and went to the police again to report my smashed screen.

So that was that and from that point, me n R were not on good terms anymore. Damage was done and I don't wanna be hurt anymnore. My life has changed and I'm living by the day. I had to extend my Exam for one of my course as I am not stable right now to concentrate on many things. I am now living like a refugee at my cousin's crib til I move to a new place with x-tra security. I don't do my laundry since I moved 3weeks ago and that is so not me. But I'm drenched out. I just buy new ones. Thank god I have plenty. When I get the chance to go home early, I wouln't go home straight. I'll be wondering around malls just to kill time so that when i reach home, I'll be too tired to think about anything except to have a bath n sleep.I can only concentrate on my work nowadays.

This is my new happiness. I was happy with R for a while and we even planned to tie the knot when my mum comes back from overseas and when i finish my Degree. But as it is, we plan, GOD decides. Know i understand the true meaning.

P/S: I'm waiting for the court hearing and will fight for my right as a human. Why should i take the blame and be the victim of their situation? There are a lot more things taht happened in between that i did not mention as it still hurts for me to even type it.Hope what I share with you can help you in someway or another.At times when I'm lonely, I do cry. But that's life. Face it.

nEW aGE hORSE Riding

2006-06-30T22:41:00.000-07:00

Isn't it amazing how we go through evolution with new technology or even the simple change from cotton dypers to the new undie-like strapped ones. Yes, it's very impressive and convinient for todays life.There are also other impressive innovations like those immediate slimming, tightening, shaping, butt-firming gadgets and machines. But what really tickles me recently was the new machine that offers one to trim down their buttocks in a horse-riding style. No need to mention names here but i'm pretty sure that most of us have seen the commercial on TV. The ride they portray sorta gives a double meaning.So for those who know, wouldn't you agree? Yippi yaiyo kaiyeah...yee-ha!!! Go cowboy!

SILLY LITTLE ME

2006-05-03T22:27:00.000-07:00

OK guys, this is an appology message upon the unintentional deletion of my post. I was trying to edit the post and accidentally erased everything out. So my post is still under construction but you'll be able to view it again soon.

puRpLe guMs

8 years to 30...yikes!

we pLan.GoD dEcideS.

nEW aGE hORSE Riding

SILLY LITTLE ME